The message is going out …

I am humbled and pleased that the story and headline of my award acceptance piece was run both as a major article and highlight. I don’t have the full article but here is the teaser:

“Award-winner says goal of communications to give voice to the voiceless

NEW ORLEANS (CNS) — Vicki Wells Bedard, honored for her work in diocesan communications over the last 25 years, urged an audience of Catholic media professionals in New Orleans to help her share her voice about a rare disease called frontotemporal dementia affecting her and about 250,000 other Americans. “As church communicators we know how important it is to give voice to the voiceless,” she said during an awards luncheon June 4 at the Catholic Media Convention in New Orleans. “Help me tell more people about this terrible disease, this dementia so often missed or misdiagnosed until it’s too advanced,” she said. Bedard made the remarks in a videotaped speech in which she accepted the 2010 President’s Medallion from the Catholic Academy for Communication Arts Professionals. The award, the academy’s highest honor, recognizes lifetime achievement and service to Catholic communications. She was present at the luncheon, held during the joint convention of the Catholic Press Association and the academy, whose members work in film and electronic media. Faith magazine helped fund the trip to the convention for Bedard and her daughters.

– – –

This clip was forwarded to others who have linked their newspaper or website (catholic dioceses); tomorrow I will be interviewed about my life as a Christian and FTD ‘chosen’. Other Catholic organizations have picked up the news piece as well.

Susan, Cindy & Elizabeth, just look what you’ve started ;o)

Love, Vicki

– – –

Added June 15: AmericanCatholic.com published the full article on their website, and we hope many other publications and websites share the story too so more people can learn about this disease that affects so many persons, yet is little known nor diagnosed effectively. Jim Coyle

Permanent link to this article: https://vickisvoice.tv/2010/06/the-message-is-going-out/

Journal June 13, 2010

My daughters are amazing. Oh, and the son.

But yesterday was Beth’s day. After long months of challenges, facing living as the cold, harsh winds of life took away her breath, scarring daily at her soul, realizing her ultimate fears. It stalked her dreams, it removed prayers from her lips, no matter how hard she held on to her beads. It left her “hope” chest empty, and her checkbook.

And she took each buffering, each devasting new reality, with her head held high, accepting the love and comfort of friends and family. Getting up, remembering to breathe, and go about the busy-ness of raising 3 teenaged sons, teaching, helping others. Some days she performed in a daze, but she is never one to give up. Her strength is amazon-like, a warrior woman.

But, yesterday she glowed at her 2nd son, Josh’s Open House. Done without spousal help. Courageous enough to let others in to assist her. And she was amazing, my little girl.

She welcomed a stream of family and friends, was positive and glowing, so much so that if one didn’t know it wasn’t always a 4 person family, they’d not be the wiser. She was gracious, caring, funny all the while totally exhausted from her role of caring for me, traveling to New Orleans, working on her Masters, taking Josh to CMU, and preparing this party.

But the height of it for me, was the video letter she wrote to him, singing his special “Joshie” song to him. Beth, I was never prouder of you. You are an elegant woman, a funny, crazy child of mine. A new person I’m glad to meet, who so many years ago, closed up to be safe.

Keep blooming, dearest Beth. The best is yet to come.

Papa? It’s me, Vicki.

Bep & Andi NOLA 2010

To Beth and her new beginnings. And to the wonderful memory of these two silly little girls of mine (r: Andrea) who woke me up with giggling and stories that erased 35 years of my memory to summer nights, trying to get them tucked in and asleep.

Permanent link to this article: https://vickisvoice.tv/2010/06/journal-june-13-2010/

Vicki Receives Communications Award


Today in New Orleans, at the Catholic Media Convention, Vicki Wells Bedard received the 2010 President’s Medallion, the highest award presented to a member of the Catholic Academy of Communication Arts Professionals. I was honored to be there with Vicki when she received the award, and wanted to share this audio recording of the award presentation, which includes a very moving response by Vicki.

[audio:http://media.libsyn.com/media/catholicmediajournal/VickiWellsBedard_2010PresidentsMedallion.mp3]

Vicki will soon be sharing her thoughts and feelings about receiving this recognition by her peers. Receiving this professional award has been a real blessing for Vicki.

Jim Coyle

(Note: We’re using a Flash audio player. Some web browsers may not display the player, or connection speeds may affect playback. If you encounter a problem, you may download the audio file and save it to your computer for playback. The file size is 12 MB.)

Permanent link to this article: https://vickisvoice.tv/2010/06/vicki-receives-communications-award/

A Friend’s Thoughts about Vicki and Her Voice

Most of the posts here on the main page of Vicki’s Voice are written by Vicki herself. Once in a while, though, I jump in to share something about Vicki that helps tell her story, helping you know Vicki better. As Vicki and I have each written earlier, the main reason for starting this blog is to help connect people, especially persons affected by dementia and other neurological diseases, and support one another in what can be incredibly difficult times. Through her writing, comments and other interaction with people through Vicki’s Voice and Facebook, Vicki shares herself with others, and with generous doses of wit, honesty and wisdom, helps many of us reflect on our own lives and in some cases open interior doors that may have been closed for a very long time.

On Facebook yesterday, in the midst of several days in which she hasn’t been able to speak, Vicki asked for prayers that her voice would return – even for 15 minutes – so she could record an important acceptance speech in case she can’t speak aloud at an upcoming conference. Since reading that request, many of us have been praying for Vicki’s audible voice to return and leaving comments to let Vicki know we were praying for her. Among those comments is one from a Facebook friend, Hope Grace, that expresses so well what Vicki is doing for other people through her life and her communication. I feel it’s important for Vicki, for me, and for all of us to read this. I doubt that Vicki would post this here, so I’m glad I have a “key” to the front door and can share it with you, with, of course, Hope Grace’s permission:

Some of my random thoughts about Vicki and her voice:

Vicki teaches me. She may find that traditional English language words fail from time to time, but her spirit voice shouts – perhaps her version of her “inside voice” – chock full of all the loudness, the gregariousness, the excitement of her outside voice, and we train the ears of our soul to hear it. What’s in Vicki’s spirit voice? Right now…perhaps some fear of the future. Fear that those entrusted with her care will not be authentic, will not speak the truth, will put on a fabricated show with certain enhancements, as if to get the ratings up. Fear that no one will hear. Fear that only the perception of the words of the others speaking on her behalf will now become the persona of Vicki rather than Vicki’s own voice speaking on her own behalf. Fear that her lived truth will not be heard. Fear that this creative, compassionate, fully-alive, brilliant, animated, energetic, accomplished woman who has used her written and spoken voice to transform and to cause change will be voiceless. Never. Perhaps simply shifting from outside voice to inside voice when she needs to. Voiceless? Never.

Vicki (and I only know of her through Facebook) is a leaper…free falling…leaping, risking, being vulnerable, saying YES, taking her own private, creative thoughts and ideas and leaping out into the unknown of sharing them with others. She never knows what their response will be, but this courageous woman always takes the leap, nonetheless, knowing that it is better to leap and risk and trust. Vicki is NEVER lukewarm. She stands for something. Even if she has fears, she risks. She connects. She shares. And oh, look at the work she has done. Looking to the years ahead now…one day unable to vocalize with her outside voice, maybe. Gasp. One day unable to type and express her outside voice through print, maybe. Gasp. One day unable to make a sandwich, even one with atypical fixins, maybe. Gasp. Going between outside and inside voice – it’s okay, it’s okay.

“In the arms of Papa” she writes frequently. Inside voice or outside voice – she speaks authentically. She speaks the truth. Always the truth. Does she actually “see” the arms of Papa the way she can see a six foot banana? I don’t know for sure, but probably not. But are the arms of Papa there? I learn from Vicki’s faith. Vicki spoke it. Vicki lives it. Vicki trusts it. Vicki goes forth and doesn’t wuss out. Despite any secret fears, Vicki leaps. Lookout baby, here she comes. It’s a free fall, but she leaps. She trusts. Vicki teaches me that leaping is where it’s at. And so I study and observe carefully, hoping to do as Vicki does. One day, if she finds she is only able to speak with her inside voice, I believe she will fully leap into the arms of her Papa with a big bright smile, a twinkly wink, a compassionate, playful, authentically encouraging “Neener, neener, neener” – looking back and nudging along those of us who have yet to leap.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Vicki. 🙂

Hope Grace

And our deepest thanks to you, Hope Grace, for putting into words what so many of us feel and experience. God bless you.

Jim Coyle

Permanent link to this article: https://vickisvoice.tv/2010/05/a-friends-thoughts-about-vicki-and-her-voice/

One Hammock Fan

In those sultry summer days of 1958 this bungalow was white with black trim. No flowers, with 5 kids no time. With 15 neighborhood kids, no grass either. The front porch was off limit for us, a sanctuary for the grown-ups. Ed kept his 45 rpm collection out there, including an extensive Peggy Lee and Eartha Kit library. The songs and the photos were NOT for children's eyes & ears. The windows didn't have screens, so it was mostly too hot to want to play out there anyway. But we would enjoy the hot nights upstairs when we were supposed to be sleeping hearing Eartha puurrrr-rr-r her way into our dads' ... hearts. And peeking at them dancing through the grate, or sneaking down the stairs.

We lay stacked like hotdogs on a roller grill – there was one tiny window in the Rutkowski bungalow on Bridge Street, and at the back another over looking the backyard. Not a breeze blowing. The girls’ room faced the West and it had been warming up all day. Between the rooms was a floor grate, where any warm air that couldn’t climb the stairs, could rise unencumbered. The rooms were tiny, really just alcoves. Rick & David had 2 twin beds, the stairs. An arch separated us. We had 2 twins, side-by-side and a baby crib, the family dresser and Sparky the dog. Linda & I were the oldest so the younger two got the doorway beds. We’d roll, synchronized, just like those hot dogs trying to find one cool spot on the pillows or sheets, but with bodies touching bodies, we just slow roasted. The babies had their dark hair plastered against their heads, dead to the world. We flipped with our heads at the foot of the bed. We moved to the floor. We punched, fluffed, shook the bedding. Nothing. Just hot and sweaty. With hair that made me look like a shampooed French poodle.

My mother had become the Queen of Toni Home Perms that summer of 3rd grade, rolling those pink perm rods so tight if you blinked they popped. With my thick, coarse hair she’d always ‘leave it in, just a few more minutes for good luck.’ Well, it was luck all right. If they’d had picks back then I’d be the first French Canadian/Dane to have a ‘fro. A BIG fro, with big ‘fro bangs. As long as I was sweating bullets, we wrapped my hair flat with Mrs. R’s chiffon scarf, in the hopes if would lie down.

This is for my lovely 'fans" ;o)

On the floor, whispering we talked about everything 9 1/2 year olds talk about. Uggy Stephen Nowasacki with his pockets o’snakes, hunky Ronald Meyers. How Mina Sonfalippo got to wear paten-leather shoes – ‘those girls’, our yucky brown wool uniforms. Somehow, just before dawn, the whispering became muted, and 2 little girls in baby doll pajamas fell asleep…

Search as I might, I couldn't find a maroon hammock fan! Imagine that ;o) They are called 'hassock fans'. These are the high end babies. Wish I could remember the big aluminum wonders. A Cincinnati friend was blessed to have one. (Does jealousy rear her ugly head??) Imagine for 51 years I thought they called it hammock. In my dreams God said "duh". lol

Why was it back then no one had more than one fan for the house? It might be a tiny window fan or one of those plane propeller professional jobs, but only one. My dad bought a maroon hammock fan, finally breaking down that summer, having survived nearly 10 muggy summers in our New Moon trailer. I’d never seen a hammock fan. A stool with a fan in it. Do you sit on it? Put your stinky feet on it? Proudly he placed it in the middle of the living room, stringing extension cords together as a frowning Mom looked on. Clicking the switch to high, it began to wind up, ready for take off. And, a breeze hovered around our ankles. Dad’s face glowed like he’d invented the steam engine, and in his own way he had. As we played out his rules of operation “blinds shut, doors closed, windows down” we began making an indoor sauna with ankle breeze.

Mom, never a shy flower, began her own plan of attack, err… operation. Dad would leave for the Armory at dawn, Mom would pry open the now swollen window, take out the screen, and lift that maroon baby into the window, sideways, blowing in. We would bask in the breeze, drinking lemonade and watch the soap operas. When Soupy Sales came on it marked the 1/2 way point. After The Guiding Light, we’d put the fan in the midroom position, close the window, pull the blinds waiting for Dad to pull into the gravel driveway. With an “Isn’t this just the best??!!” look on his face, we’d smile innocently, as the sweat began poofing mom’s and my matching Toni poodle cuts. This worked well until dad came home early one day. Caught.

Mom said “I made chocolate chip cookies” heading for the kitchen. I was intent on my paper dolls. Not missing a beat, dad turned the fan to blow out. Which made me think ankle breezes might have an appeal after all.

So now, with a new operation manual, she turned it blowing in, he turned it blowing out. Finally, I just said the obvious. “It’s HOT in here!!!” A cranky child can perform miracles. Taking out the weird hammock fan, dad removed the top, exposing it’s BIG blades, and voila! We had a fan! And a compromise. Nights, it sucked out. Days it blew in.

Until the day they died, they had that one fan. The Hammock Fan. I forget whether it blew in or sucked out, I just worried about my babies’ fingers.

Love you, Bev & Perry. Always have, always will. Is it ok if when we meet we have A/C???

~ ~ ~

Is that you, Papa? It’s me, Vicki.

The Kaminski's 7 kids lived next door. The house was blue and big. Not much furniture, some keen cement block & wood bookcases. I was an only and an object of curiosity. My stash of dolls boggled their minds. Their little brothers poking the dolls' eyes out boggled mine. Life is like that.

One door over was the cemetery. Our favorite hide-n-seek place, a great place for flowers for moms when we came back too late. Same place is only 2 blocks away now, and I thought I heard giggling behind the tree as I scooted around at dusk.

Voila!! the famous "Poodle Cut" for you younguns. But picture it with a 'fro look, being 9 years old and poofs 3x as big. Our family put the "fun" in dysfunctional, my mom used to say. Darn if she wasn't right!

Permanent link to this article: https://vickisvoice.tv/2010/05/one-hammock-fan/